Clean Eating Detox: Day 7

We are half-way through our two-week clean eating challenge. For info on days 0-6, click here or use the "Clean Eats" label to the far right.

Each day of the challenge we receive breakfast, lunch, a daytime snack, dinner and a nighttime snack. Today we made:

In light of my 12+ hour Relay extravaganza and J's early work schedule, we opted to switch out Saturday's labor intensive breakfast (poaching an egg!?!) for Sunday's blueberry smoothie. It was pretty good, but like our first smoothie (kale-banana) it was an overwhelming portion with a gritty texture. Other than having to brush my teeth for twice as long as normal, it was pretty decent.

Lunch was a black bean, kale and feta salad. It was another one extraordinary salad. This one didn't feature any wild flavors - like fennel, or heavy herbs - but scallions and kale as a base. And a simple lemon juice/olive oil dressing that we had to "massage" into the kale; which is a vital step. The massaging of the acid/oil softens the kale's texture without making it wilt, or over dressing it. This time we got 2 oz. of feta which was a super generous portion and added the necessary salt. 

For snack we were allotted 1/2 and orange and 2 T of raw, unsalted almonds. But, I was in a staying-up-all-night coma that left me napping through snack time. I did add my almonds to my nighttime snack. 

Buzzfeed original photo

This evening, J made "big batches" of tomato sauce and turkey basil meatballs with collard greens. This was a really exciting presentation where the collards acted as our "noodles" with meatballs and a wonderful fully homemade vegetable sauce. The sauce is impeccable and full of flavor and would be healthier and cheaper than store bought sauce; we did leave ours a little more chunky than the recipe suggested. I liked the meatballs, they were a little more bland than J's signature meatballs - old family recipe with crazy ingredients but tastes like heaven. 

For nighttime snack we were allotted 1 oz of dark chocolate (no milk this time, so no gray cocoa) and were in such a hurry to dive in to our only "candy" that we didn't take a photo. I've mentioned before that I'm a milk chocolate person, but I can tell that my taste buds are being more perceptive to subtle sugar, because even though this bar was 70% cacao it had a great sweetness to it (compared to our "desserts" of late). 

Buzzfeed original photo

Day 7 synopsis: I feel great. I can't pinpoint any great changes in myself but I have felt satisfied, full and pleased with all of the great food we've enjoyed this last week and look forward to more in the upcoming week. 

Clean Eating Detox: Day 6

We have conquered 6 whole days of our two-week clean eating challenge. For info on days 0-5, click here or use the "Clean Eats" label to the far right.

I apologize for my lateness, but yesterday was our local Relay for Life event - of which I was a county-wide committee member, a team captain and a member of two teams. I stayed there from 3:00 p.m. Friday to 6:00 a.m. this morning and I'm exhausted.

I apologize if my comments aren't incredibly in-depth or observant, because aside from 1:00 a.m. Zumba, I hardly remember a thing.

Each day of the challenge we receive breakfast, lunch, a daytime snack, dinner and a nighttime snack. Day 6's menu included:

Chia seed pudding with mango and pistachios. Now, let's get this clear, they use the word "pudding" really loosely. Really, really loosely. This is not a pudding, it's some kinda thick, goopy and ugly fruity mess. The flavor's pretty good, but the texture takes some getting used to. I could take or leave this.

An arugula and leftover greenbean salad with Thursday night's salmon and dijon vinaigrette. I loved this salad! You pre-dress the salmon with a tad of the herby, mustard dressing and it is so flavorful and bold. The dressing is wonderful and a pairing of flavors we've yet to use in the challenge. J doesn't like arugula or green beans, but the peppery arugula was toned down by the dressing; but he still didn't enjoy cold green beans. 

For snack we again had carrots and hummus, and this time with half a cucumber. Nothing new there. 

At dinnertime at the Relay track, J brought containers filled with black bean chili with Greek yogurt and zucchini ribbons. This was delicious! It was a filling, hearty chili and the smoky paprika yogurt cut through the tomato base with a tangy creaminess. Everyone at our camp was "oohing" and "aahing" over our dinner and it actually made me forget about the giant hot dogs and funnel cakes. In the summer, J makes a saute of zucchini, yellow squash and mushrooms that goes with any dish. These ribbons reminded me of that with their flavorful simplicity. 

To stay awake, I brought along several "clean" snacks, but our scheduled nighttime snack was blackberries with pistachios. Like the blueberry/almond bowl earlier in the week, it was a combination I would have never chosen for myself but greatly enjoyed. 

Day 6 synopsis: The onverwhelming lesson of the day is that this menu does require work for dinners. On nights when you have limited time at home or a crunched schedule, this could be tricky. My all-star husband left Relay for an hour to cook dinner and bring it back. I know when this challenge is over - and so far we are very interested in continuing this lifestyle - we will have to continue to plan ahead very carefully and stay organized. I also wonder how applicable it is being away from home and having to eat out. The Buzzfeed article does include info on what to order but it was a very limited list that we haven't tested yet.

This is symbolic of how I feel, minus the extreme exhaustion.

Clean Eating Detox: Day 5

We are almost out of fennel! Oh, and we have survived five days of our two-week clean eating challenge! For info on Days 0-4 click here or use the "Clean Eats" label to the far right.

Each day of the detox features a breakfast, lunch, daytime snack, dinner and nighttime snack. On today's docket, we had:

A cauliflower omelet for breakfast. This was delicious. The cauliflower was very hearty and added an interesting texture to the omelet. And if you didn't know, paprika is great with any cauliflower or egg dish. I thought I would miss the ever-present cheese, but I actually didn't - there were enough rich flavors. I will say though this is a huge amount of cauliflower (and it's dependent upon the size of the cauliflower used in Day 3's dinner) and if you expect this to look like a pretty folded omelet, I'm sorry. The cauliflower adds nothing to the structural integrity of the omelet. And like yesterday, this isn't a good traveling meal, you have to make it and eat it at home so despite it being huge, you will probably be hungry earlier.

Lunch consisted of a chickpea, blueberry and kale (was supposed to be roasted fennel) salad with mint, pistachios and lime juice. Even though we subbed in the kale instead of fennel, this salad sucked. The trio of toppings - chick peas, blue berries and pistachios - was delightful and a beautiful flavor and texture combination. However, the kale was somewhat bland and its texture fell flat which made for mushy on mushy on mushy. And even though we've loved most of the citrus dressings, just squeezing a lime over a salad is not sufficient - it makes for uneven flavor and the flavor that is there is way too sharp.

Our daytime snack was 4 medium carrots and a 1/4 c of hummus. Always a winner - and you get such a huge quantity that we didn't actually pack all of the carrots (only 3) and I split my snack into before- and after-lunch installments.

Dinner was roasted salmon with green beans and lentils. I have been looking forward to this all week. We've never cooked salmon together, so I was psyched and this dinner did not disappoint! J doesn't like green beans but was actually pleased with the texture these had from only a few quick minutes of simmering. This meal had what all meals strive for - well-balanced flavors that compliment each other, and a variety of textures to keep your mouth guessing. A shining moment of this whole experience was J saying "Even with the green beans, I'd eat this again!" Although this is a totally different bean preparation than I've ever done, it gave my little Southern-green-bean-canning-woman heart hope.

For our evening snack we had 1/4 of blueberries and 2 T (surprisingly a lot) of raw, unsalted almonds. This was wonderfully simple but still flavorful and interesting. This is not something I would ever pick by myself, but it works!

Day 5 synopsis: I was disappointed through the afternoon at being hungry due to the crappy salad, but overall, this was a successful day of food. Because of being sleepy and hungry, I quickly became hangry and began thinking about all of the things I could be getting out of the vending machine at work - but I powered through. And it made me think about how do-able this is long term. I thought about all of the meals we've eaten and how it's shaped our eating schedule and it works. I think we would want to incorporate some of our old favorites but the majority of these recipes, skills and schedules work for our lifestyle.

My clean eating observation of the day is that if you choose to start a clean eating lifestyle, you need to absolutely consider composting. Our trash can is absurdly heavy just from all of the peelings, rinds, seeds, pits and cores, and with all of the eggshells we're going to be tossing next week (15+ apiece) you'd have a great start to an at home compost pile. There are great odor-blocking, indoor cans for composting that are reasonably priced. You could go from clean eating to clean living.

P.S. We got a "clean care package" today from my best friend - a bag of quinoa from his local farmer's market! 

Clean Eating Detox: Day 4

We're closing in on a third of the way through our two-week clean eating challenge!

For info on Days 0-3 click here or use the "Clean Eats" label to the far right.

Each day of the detox features a breakfast, lunch, daytime snack, dinner and nighttime snack. Wednesday's fare included:

A breakfast of a scallion and feta omelet; and it was delicious! The scallions were softened in the pan with olive oil before adding the eggs and their flavor intensified. Also, contrary to my "I love cheese" lifestyle, an ounce of feta, goes a long way - you don't need a ton. This added just the right amount of saltiness. And two eggs were actually more than enough for me (men get 3) to keep me full. I will say though, I had to get up earlier to make my omelet, so I was hungry earlier than I would be if I could eat my breakfast at work. I will make this again - and tomorrow, we get another omelet!

A Greek salad (no yogurt, thank God) with leftover "big batch lentils," spinach, red pepper, cucumber, parsley, feta and more "big batch lime vinaigrette." This was also great. It was a bit more sparse than the past few salads, but it was still filling and delicious. One thing I've loved about this challenge is it is totally re-inventing the salad for me. Including items that are 1. normally served warm, and 2. served as sides has added great texture, flavor, substance and oftentimes, meatless protein to what could be a plain salad. We did opt to only use 1/2 a red pepper and 1/4 of a cucumber (we get the giant English cucumbers, and 6" of cuke in a salad is overkill) each though.

Chia seed, mango, and banana smoothie for our daytime snacks. This was AMAZING. Beats the kale-banana smoothie by a mile. This had amazing flavor -- it was sweet!!!! -- and the texture was really good too. It was more drinkable than our Sunday shake and the chia seeds had softened some since morning and had a slight crunch that was really pleasing. Winning recipe.

The dreaded roasted fennel, spinach and "big batch roasted chicken" bowl. However, I must admit, we "cheated." We could not bear the idea of making a "big batch" o' fennel - so we instead made another "big batch of steamed kale." Still clean, just not the flavor profile they were looking for. The recipe didn't include a dressing, since fennel would be the leading (read: overpoweringly gross) flavor, so it was slightly bland but still good and filling.

And, uh, this happened.. 

And a nighttime snack of two almond-stuffed medjool dates. I was skeptical about this snack only because I thought it would no way be filling, but it was a decent snack to end the day. And, more importantly, it was deliciously sweet. My parents used to make a "unclean" date snack at the holidays with plain dates, stuffed with a mix of powdered sugar and cream cheese and topped with a pecan. They are heavenly - and probably like 300 calories a piece. Medjool dates are much bigger but still with a wonderful, rich, earthy sweetness and the almond stuffed inside adds a great crunch. I can see myself packing this in my lunch or something later.

Day 4 synopsis: Overall, today's food was pretty great. These are all meals I'd eat again, several of which I'd actually order at a restaurant just hearing the description. This is what clean eating is about  -- it's not about eating kale until you're green or drinking nothing but wheatgrass shakes. It's about appreciating the flavors that already exist in nature. Nothing here was "jazzed" up; everything included ingredients that were just that ingredients - our salad dressing was lime juice and olive oil only - and that's the point. There are so many good foods out there for us to enjoy, that our bodies need and can appreciate in a healthful way that there's no reason to add monosodium glutomate or high fructose corn syrup.

However, those processed things really do get their claws into you. I've told you that I've been craving sugar; J said from the get go that next Sunday he wants a giant cookie cake that says "Happy Birthday" on it, and now, he may or may not be lucid dreaming just to eat food. The night before last, my frequent sleep-talker either said "Ok, so.." or "queso" and fell back asleep and last night he dreamed about Taco Bell; tonight he said "I hope I dream about a big chocolate cake!"

Clean Eating Detox: Day 3

Third day's a charm, right? We are three days in to our two-week clean eating challenge! For info on Days 0-2 click here or use the "Clean Eats" label to the far right.

Each day of the detox features a breakfast, lunch, daytime snack, dinner and nighttime snack. Today we ate:

A blackberry yogurt parfait with raw almonds and ground flaxseed for breakfast. Same idea as yesterday - Greek yogurt is bitter. A cup of Greek yogurt is absurdly bitter and becomes an exhausting chore to eat. However, the blackberries, flaxseed and almonds were delicious. I am amazed at how far 2 T of almonds go! This would be delicious with half the amount of yogurt or a flavored yogurt, but suffice to say, I'm tired of plain Greek yo', yo.

Asian chicken salad (napa cabbage, carrots and almonds) with leftover (theoretically - see note below) "big batch roasted chicken" tossed with a dressing made from last night's "big batch lime vinaigrette" and tamari for lunch. This was DELICIOUS and enormous. The lime vinaigrette that was very acidic and sour was toned down by the tamari (wheat-free soy sauce) and brought a perfectly balanced salt and nuttiness to the salad. Unlike some of the other dishes where flavors are extreme (above, or last night's basil), this dish was completely in sync. 

And look below at the quantity you get here - J made his salad in a gallon bowl from the restaurant's prep kitchen and it was probably manageable to eat. I tried to make do with the dishes I had at work, so you'll see I used a glass quart-sized bowl, but you can't see the pile o' salad in another cereal bowl and on a full-sized plate and it still overflowed all my vessels! Wow! 

Note: in the grocery list, when it talks about bone-in, skin-on chicken breast, it is talking about weight after bones are removed. How in the hell you are supposed to predict this, I don't know. That being said, we had to cook extra boneless/skinless chicken to complete this meal and one later in the week. We are finding several discrepancies with the recipes/shopping lists in PDF form - the day-to-day instructions (which I'm sharing in each post) are much more detailed, and so far, accurate. 

Three-fourths of an avocado with kosher salt and lemon juice for our daytime snack. I love avocados. I know they aren't for everyone. They're unnervingly creamy - which is usually the international symbol for rotten, and they smell partly bland and partly funky. I love the creamy, unique flavor of avocados, so I was thrilled to get to eat almost a whole one with just a little boost of acid and tartness and salt. One of my favorite dishes is an avocado stuffed with breadcrumbs, garlic and salsa - I may have to just substitute this or try a clean adaptation. 

Cauliflower steaks with lentils for dinner. This was amazing. I love cauliflower and this did not disappoint. I've roasted florets before, but I've never cooked them in "steak" form. It's such a hearty vegetable already, prepping it in a faux beef cut just added to it's meatiness. I've only used lentils in a few dishes, mostly curries (and vegan tacos) so I was excited to have them sharing the spotlight of this meal. They're seasoned with a ton of paprika which lends a great smokiness that hearkens bacon. The flavors were spot on and I'm stuffed. I know we'll be making this again; not just for the flavors, but that it's so inexpensive, despite the fact I think this dish would easily be listed in a frou frou vegetarian/vegan restaurant for upwards of $10.

And a glass of homemade dark hot cocoa for our nighttime snack. I've been waiting for this chocolate with bated breath. I'm a milk chocolate person but at this point, I'm pumped for anything that resembles a sweet. We had our chocolate and almond milk two ways - J wanted to savor his so he broke his chocolate into tiny pieces and ate them like a delicate princess. I made gritty, gray "cocoa." If you do the challenge, opt with J's way. 

Day 3 synopsis:  Other than being beyond "over" Greek yogurt, I'm still pretty satisfied. Today was the first day I had to clean eat at work, which is the land of perpetual hunger and I stayed full and that's a big plus! I did however, look ahead and saw that we are making "big batch roasted fennel" tomorrow to incorporate into three (!) additional meals. I am not pumped. 

On another "research" point, I listened to a really interesting story today on (you guessed it) NPR Morning Edition about the farm-to-table trend talked about by hippies/pretentious foodies everywhere. To me, it sounds like a great idea, but one of the problems, I hadn't realized is how unrealistic American food expectations affect this (and the food industry in general). We are so accustomed to having a lot of everything at one time, we don't consider crop rotation or that a balanced diet does not mean equal parts meat:plants. The most interesting point the author made is that in no culture outside of America do people think expecting a 12 oz. serving of meat (say, steak) to be normal. Meat is a part of some meals but not a big-serving staple. And in this diet, I'm really appreciating the way the rest of the world thinks. We are eating mostly vegetables, and when we do have meat, it's measured out - we get a specific, reasonable amount. And turns out 4 oz (for women, 6 oz for men) is enough - it's satisfying and compliments our ample veggies well. 

Also, this non-stop cooking marathon we're on continually reminds me what an amazing husband I have who enthusiastically and blindly agreed to follow me into Fennel Purgatory and does all the heavy lifting with prep despite cooking all day. Some husbands just aren't as supportive - like this whiny, but hysterical bro whose wife "convinced" him to take the challenge too. He's my Top Chef, for sure.

This is not my "yay fennel!" dance - can't wait to see what tomorrow's Buzzfeed gif will be. 

Clean Eating Detox: Day 2

On to day 2 of our two-week clean eating challenge! For info on Day 1 click here.

Each day of the detox features a breakfast, lunch, daytime snack, dinner and nighttime snack. Monday's menu featured:

Overnight oats made with rolled oats (duh), almond milk, Greek yogurt, chia seeds, honey and blueberries for breakfast. Admittedly, this dish looked and tasted equally weird. First, it doesn't take a lot of oatmeal to fill you up, so a pint mason jar full of oats is a bit much - especially when the flavor is...off. Pairing tangy plain Greek yogurt with fairly tart blueberries and the remaining bland ingredients makes for a very bitter breakfast. The texture was great but the flavor was cloyingly tart with the blueberries being the only (minimal) burst of sweetness. We're making this again on Day 13 with strawberries and that may be better and sweeter. I'd also be willing to tinker with this recipe using a flavored Greek yogurt and maybe vanilla and/or sweetened almond milk after our detox.

For lunch we utilized leftovers from Day 1's dinner to make a fennel, steamed kale, quinoa, chickpea and mint salad with orange vinaigrette and a sprinkle of Parmesan cheese. First things first, I think fennel is a vile vegetable. I despise licorice and can't believe that the disgusting flavor is not a man-made atrocity but actually natural in fennel and star anise. So eating a salad that includes half of a bulb of fennel wasn't my cup of tea. However, picking out the majority of the fennel left a great (substantial) salad. The cold quinoa and kale made a had a great texture and the orange-garlic vinaigrette added a lot of bold flavors. I think using a different green - like cabbage - instead of the fennel would be delicious.

Today's snack was an artsy take on the fairly common caprese salad with tomatoes, basil, feta (instead of traditional mozzarella) and a drizzle of balsamic vinegar. I've mentioned before that I'm really texture conscious and because of that, raw tomatoes are not my thing. But, if i spoon the "guts" out, I don't mind them too much. This was a pretty delicious snack. It's my first real foray into balsamic and I must say it's a little funky. I liked the bites with less, or no, vinegar than the ones that did.

At dinner, we used the left over "big batch roasted chicken" in napa cabbage cups with mangoes, tomatoes and avocados with lime vinaigrette and a side salad of arugula and tomatoes using the same vinaigrette. I found two major flaws with this dish. Napa cabbage leaves have big "stems" at the bottom of each, yet we were instructed to serve the leaves whole - which made them gigantic and impossible to fold into wrap form - so we broke the stems off. Secondly, six leaves of basil is entirely too much for one person to eat in one dish. Ick! I picked all of mine out because I couldn't taste anything but herbaceous flavor. With those two edits, the chicken cups were great. The avocado was creamy and smooth almost like a mayo, and the mango brightened everything. The "salad" was a flop for us though - J hates arugula and you know about me and tomatoes. We were supposed to both eat a whole tomato again with dinner, but screw that.

For our evening snack we were allowed two clementines or one large orange. Those tiny oranges aren't available here year-round, only in the winter, so we each had a navel orange. An orange is an orange, what can I say.

Day 2 synopsis: We had to make more "edits" to our meals today to accommodate our favorite (or not-so-favorite) flavors, but I'm still satisfied over-all.

I know it's too early to tell if this is cleaning our systems or to feel any health improvements. However, I have been really aware of how full I've felt throughout the day. And I think that the menu plans do include a lot of food, but preparing everything from scratch, at home has made us eat more mindfully. We're eating at the table together and taking our time, rather than blindly eating on the couch. And whether that's physically more healthy, I really think it will be a great way to spend time together and be relaxing bookends for our days.

As I mentioned yesterday, we are realizing how often we normally eat sugar-y things and that absence is somewhat off-putting. So far, our only "sweets" have been at our night time snack and for the most part that's okay. But like in our breakfast this morning, I am thinking about how sugar - even natural sugars - in moderation enhance flavors. Too much of a good thing (sugar) is bad, but avoiding it entirely doesn't fully utilize our palates. I can live without candy bars for two weeks, but damnit can we add more honey to the oats and yogurt? And from the research I've done,this desire for sweetness isn't unnatural. It's actually an instinct developed eons ago to help us search out good fruits/veggies to eat that had calories to support their daily activities - killing mammoths, and the like - and that we still see it today in how babies gravitate to sweet purees, like banana, before more savory flavors, like green beans. We have as a culture taken this to the extreme what with our Coke and Twinkies but I can feel my tongue aching for something sweet, and I'm convinced that's not entirely a bad thing.

And  because they're too funny to ignore, here's Buzzfeed's gif of the day demonstrating our pride in completing two days of clean eating.

Clean Eating Detox: Day 1

Today is the first day of our two-week clean eating challenge and so far, we're off to a great start! 

Each day of the detox features a breakfast, lunch, daytime snack, dinner and nighttime snack. Day 1's menu included: 

We had a banana-kale smoothie with almond milk, raw almond butter and vanilla extract for breakfast. It was different my idea of a smoothie because it wasn't overwhelmingly sweet like many commercial smoothies made with flavored yogurt or ice cream, and it had a gritty texture from the kale, opposed to a smoother, fruit and dairy-heavy drink. But the flavor is great and doesn't taste like a cliche "health-food." And it was a huge portion and kept me full for a long time. This eased my big fear that we are doomed to starve to death on this diet. 

For lunch we had a shaved asparagus salad with shallots and fried eggs. Again, this was another substantial dish that filled me up - and I couldn't even eat it all! We eat salads fairly frequently but never like this! I've never shaved asparagus or added fried eggs to salads and it was delicious. Also, the dressing was just lemon juice and it added a surprising complexity. My only complaint was that there was way too much tomato (which I don't like to begin with) which made the salad almost too big and watery; next time I'd only use half a tomato per salad. We will be making this again for sure!

One of our two snacks was three medium-sized carrots cut into matchsticks with 1/4 c of hummus. I was so full from lunch that I actually didn't eat mine and J found it to be almost too many carrots to eat. 

For dinner we made several "big batch" recipes that will continue to be used throughout the week, including quinoa, steamed kale, roasted chicken breast and orange vinaigrette that were tossed together. This was an excellent entree; another "make again" dish for sure. We had feared that this dish might be flavorless and bland, but it wasn't! The chicken is cooked bone-in, skin-on with only salt and pepper but you allow the seasoned chicken to rest for 30 minutes before cooking and the flavors actually soak in quite well. The quinoa (which we'd never tried before) was perfectly salted and the vinaigrette added lots of acidic, garlic flavor, too! 

As our nighttime snack, we each had a thinly sliced pear with 2 T of raw almond butter. I was skeptical of this - I like pears but almond butter looks a whole lot like paper mache paste, a poor substitute for peanut butter. But it was delicious! It isn't nearly as sweet or smooth as peanut butter but it's texture and subtle sweetness paired perfectly with the pears (or licked right off the plate as I just caught J doing). 

Day 1 synopsis: We've been pleasantly surprised by the flavors and quantity of food in these recipes. My hunger worries are, so far, unfounded. However, we did realize how literally addicted we are to sugar. J's been bemoaning the utter lack of cookies and ice cream in the plan and I'd love to sneak a bite of leftover Easter candy, myself. And the no-coffee rule is already taking it's toll on my husband. Even on a stress-free Sunday, he's dragging without his big mug of coffee. We are technically allowed to have up to three cups of unsweetened green tea, but really who wants to drink that? 

There are also two kitchen observations we made today. The cooking doesn't take an excessive amount of time but you do need to be organized and have your thoughts and plans straight - so don't worry. However, you will go through some dishes! Thankfully, we have used some of our less-frequently-utilized kitchen tools - like our new mandolin and juicer - but have had to run a load through our dishwasher and hand washed two sinks-worth more! 

And in the words of the detox's origin, Buzzfeed - complete with motivational gif; 

"You made it through Day 1 of the Challenge. Way to go!"

Our Clean Eating Detox: Day 0 Observations

Because we are pursuing a healthy lifestyle and love to try new things and/or are masochists, J and I are starting a Clean Eating detox tomorrow.

Clean eating is a premise we've flirted with some in our cooking, and find exceptionally intriguing. We recently had a conversation with a friend about how little legitimate food we are actually eating. As a society - if not an global era - we are eating more processed, refined food-like products rather than actual, unadulterated fruits, vegetables, proteins and grains.

Just look at the ingredients on the back of this snack pack of animal crackers. I bought them because they were inexpensive and in a low-calorie serving, but then the ingredients were pointed out to me.

Gotta love the typo too... 

Although clean eating diets do combine elements of several "trendy" diets - low carb, gluten-free, organic - it's based on the solid principal of cooking and eating ingredients that are as close to their natural state as possible. So the summer Cookout shake binge is on hold, but the recipes we're working with for the next two weeks look pretty great.

The detox is a plan we found on Buzzfeed - the black hole into which all 20-somethings fall and lose hours on end - and is thoroughly planned out. Seriously, we're talking 53 pages of menus, FAQs, equipment (paltry) and grocery (insurmountable) lists. The cleanse lasts 14 days and is planned where several "big batch" dishes are made that will be served in several meals so they've scheduled everything perfectly - even the Saturday prep days, what to pack in your lunchbox, how to store it,  and freezer packs with "when to thaw" instructions. Each day includes breakfast, lunch, a day snack, dinner and a night snack. Only a  few of the recipes repeat - only breakfasts and snacks - so it's a ton of variety.

The variety makes for an impressive fortnight menu that's heavy on the veggies and fruits, fatty proteins like nuts and fish, and white meats, but not light on flavor. For example: Day 5 includes a cauliflower omelet, quinoa and blueberry salad with lime and mint, carrots and hummus, salmon with green beans and lentils and blueberries with almonds.

We start our clean eating adventure tomorrow, so today was spent shopping and doing prep - and it was quite an educational undertaking.

First, I'd like to say that the pre-planned grocery lists are very heavy on the first week - so you can do freezer packs and make dishes late in the week, with leftovers continuing into Week 2. With that being said, List 1 had over 60 items on it -- only a few of which we had on hand at our house, spices mostly (Week 2 has 30+). So one of our first lessons was that clean eating is...expensive! 

The plan is designed for one person, so we had to double everything (quite a math struggle - especially with some units/ingredients "quart container of basil"??) and that pushed our bills (yes, bills, more on that later) even higher. Look at the sheer amount of food we had to purchase.

For perspective - this table seats two full-sized chairs per side. We thought we'd have to use the leaf to hold all the food!

This haul included, but was not limited to: 128 oz. plain Greek yogurt, 24 oz. feta cheese, 24 oz. 70% cacao dark chocolate, 4 red bell peppers, 2 lbs. spinach ...

8 oranges, 2 oz. fresh mint, 64 oz. unsweetened plain almond milk, 20 oz. bone-in, skin-on chicken breast; 20 oz. fresh salmon, 20 oz. ground turkey, 4 bulbs of fennel, 2 seedless English cucumbers...

a bottle of Tamari (gluten-free soy sauce), 6 bunches (12 c.) of kale, 53 eggs (for both weeks, thank goodness), 28 carrots and so much more!

Certainly not the way to an efficient fridge... 

I won't throw out a number, but let's just say that this shopping trip was at least three times more expensive than our regular weekly, to bi-monthly trips - and this was just food, no toiletries, cleaning supplies, home goods included!

We did try to remind ourselves that this is every scrap of food we will be eating for a solid week (and then some) - we won't be making stops at the store on the way home after those "what do you want for dinner" conversations where we end up buying way too many things for one night, but not enough to satisfy the rest of the week's meals and we won't be going out to eat AT ALL.

J: "60 grocery items and not an Oreo in the bunch..."

But still, this is a cost-prohibitive menu for many; I know we couldn't do this year-round. I"m a bargain shopper - I will go from store to store and back looking for the best deal (we did that today to J's chagrin) and I was struggling to find products with suitable price tags. For example, at Harris Teeter I could hardly find any non-organic foods. They were all farm raised, free-range items that were at least 10% more expensive than their (absent) counterparts normally are.

And that's one of the biggest issues with food insecurity and health in the US. Fresh, unprocessed (read:good for you) food is much more expensive than junk food. While begrudgingly shopping (it went from fun to tiring quickly), we talked about how although it wouldn't be nutritious and certainly would lose it's deliciousness quickly, a loaf of bread, jar of peanut butter and some lunch meat would help a paycheck or SNAP (food stamps) go much further. And if you're in a tight spot, sometimes choosing between the dollar menu and organic produce has to be a choice about money.

Many areas are fighting this trend; farm gleaning projects bring fresh produce to food pantries, neighborhoods are starting community gardens and co-ops, and buying local CSAs provide reliable and less expensive produce, but in many places, these projects don't exist.

Which brings me to my next point. Clean eating is...potentially geographically biased. Another major issue with food disparities in the US is the undeniable presence of food deserts. Food deserts are places where "fresh produce is scarce and greasy food abounds." Think of big cities where the only sources of "groceries" are corner markets that are cramped and filled with non-perishable, processed items or rural areas where grocery stores are difficult to reach, especially without owning a car. This is a reality for many people and we were very aware of this while shopping. We actually drove an hour to Asheville where we knew we could find all of the ingredients we needed, and even then had to go to over four stores. There were many items we were skeptical about finding, and especially finding in good quality, quantity and pricing in our hometown. We stopped at our local grocer on the way home for goods we knew they'd have (at great prices) and saw some of the things we thought required a trip to Trader Joe's or Earthfare, but that isn't the reality for everyone.

Here are some of the items we didn't think we would find (or find affordable) in our town - quinoa, chia seeds, ground flaxseeds, tamari and medjool dates.

From the shopping trip alone, we can tell that this detox may also be... time consuming. There will be considerably more prep-time required as opposed to making Hamburger Helper or picking up a pizza. And while that can be another disadvantage for the working class, this detox plan does offer very detailed instructions for multi-tasking and make-ahead meals and freezer pouches.

But, so far, I can say my overwhelming feeling about clean eating is...excitement.  I do not doubt this will have challenging moments: some of these foods are not my cup of tea, and speaking of tea, J is already dreading going without coffee and only being allowed three cups of unsweetened green tea per day; and I think I may struggle with hunger. Yet, I'm still excited to try new things. I can honestly say that I've never made any of these recipes before and without the menu would never buy 30% of these items .


I think it's going to be fun, delicious, and most importantly, good for us!

Buzzfeed promises we'll feel like this when it's over..

We'll certainly share pictures of our moods - and dance moves - throughout the process! Stay tuned!